Lumberjacking

The wind was blowing pretty good today and I found myself lumberjacking quite often on the hill. For those who don't understand what lumberjacking is, it's the process of covering one nostril with a finger and cleaning the second nostril with a hard snort. I didn't realize until today of how much of a master you have to be to lumberjack successfully without interrupting your current goal.

Women, (especially Barbara) don't understand the importance of clearing your sinus in stride. From day one mothers are teaching their youngster to cover their nose with a kerchief and blow. That is fine and dandy at the restaurant but can you imagine how much time you would lose and how many kerchiefs you would have to carry if you stopped each time the need came while chukar hunting or any other kind of hunting. Success on the hill isn't measured by proper manners.

With that being said, I am applying for a grant to teach proper lumberjacking. Hopefully when the grant comes through I'll be able to educate hunters the proper mountain man way to get the snot out without breaking stride. It is much more complicated than just covering up one side and snorting through the other.

In my class you will learn things like proper pressure. Too much pressure causes pain and forces the head to an improper angle. You will also learn the proper head angle as well as snorting volume. Who wants the excreted matter on their shirt or a lunger hanging from the nose. These type things take time to clean up and waste valuable hunting time. The quick burst of the snort must be mastered to prevent headaches and clean removal. You'll learn the sound of a clean release that send the snot rocket into the direction of choice. When you finally accomplish the clean release, you no longer will have to use your shirt sleeve or shoulder to wipe off any excess. It will cleanly be placed on the mountain. Even your laundry bill will show effects of learning in my school of lumberjacking. Shirt will have to be washed only half as much because that hard crust will no longer be on the sleeve and shoulder.

Not wanting to give up to much professional advice I'm going to leave it at that and hope that you enroll in the L&J school of snot removal. We'll be taking applicants as soon as the grant comes through. Meanwhile enjoy this video of Jake.

A very important P.S.  My grandson and hunting partner, Conner got his letter last night for wrestling at Rocky Mtn. High. Pretty proud of him as a freshmen to accomplish that. Conner, Mom and little brother Mac.